Fifty Shades of Nay

I just finished reading Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James and, try as I might, I couldn’t learn to like it. Like Twilight before it, I’m having a difficult time understanding how so many people (ok, mostly women, but I could be wrong) can read it without their suspension of disbelief crashing to the floor on every other page.  I had to keep scooping mine up, glueing it back together, and forcing it back into the story. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good sex scene as much as the next consenting adult, and it’s a rare pleasure … Continue reading

A Touchy Subject

Today I watched a teenage boy squirm when he was required to kiss an adult relative, and it got me thinking about why we subject ourselves (and our children) to such displays of fake affection. We learn about touching from our mothers (and fathers, too.)  Most mammals enjoyed touching and being touched (although there are individuals that don’t due to physical, mental, or emotional constraints).  Children crave it, and so do adults (unless they’re learned to shut out the need as a self-defense mechanism.) Even marine mammals pat, nudge, nip and caress their friends, family, and potential mates. (And it’s … Continue reading

Life’s Little Ups & Downs

Welcome to the 21st Century: No toothpaste, pocketknives, or snowglobes allowed.  (And beware the dreaded silk scarf.)  What am I talking about? TSA, of course. I like to travel, but I hate traveling to get there. It’s when I’m pushing a laptop, a raincoat, a pair of shoes, an iPad, an empty computer shoulder bag, a sweater, a silk scarf (“you have to take that off, too”), a ziplock baggy containing tiny bottles, a corkscrew (no blade), and a carry-on (now mostly empty) one-by-one through an x-ray machine that I find traveling to be particularly painful. And that’s not the worst of it. Because I refuse … Continue reading

Warm Sex

If you type “warm sex” into google, the first suggestion you’ll get is “warm sexy pajamas.”  Really.  It would seem that women have at least as much trouble finding attractive sleepwear as they do finding good sex. Although I understand the challenges involved in looking sexy in long-johns, I won’t be addressing that problem in this post. (The photo at left is from Victoria’s Secret, so if you happened to drop in while actually searching for warm, sexy PJs, you might check those out.) In my last post about bad sex, you might recall that I promised to talk about what I … Continue reading

Sex & Pink Socks

Occasionally, a woman may need to bite her tongue.  Although that may sound like a kinky sex tip, it isn’t — but I’ll get to that in a minute.  First, let me give you a little background on the Pink Sock Situation. I was in Egypt right before all hell broke loose in January 2011.  While cruising down the Nile (the only major river in the world that flows to the north), my husband and I sent off seven days worth of dirty socks and a couple other items to be washed.  We were traveling light: five people for three … Continue reading

How To Tell If a Lawyer Is Lying

“Answer yes or no!” The guy in the expensive suit slams a thick stack of papers down on the desk in front of me. I don’t know what to say.  The question is misleading.  There isn’t an answer. He leans over me, his voice barely controlled. “I repeat: Have you stopped beating your husband?” Okay, that’s not what they asked me, but it was the same sort of twisted question where if you say “no,” you’re admitting that you beat your husband, and if you say “yes,” then you’re admitting that you did beat him.  What would you say?  Answer yes or … Continue reading

About This Blog

This late-night blog is about how people fit together (or not, as the case may be).  Topics include a variety of relationships (mostly human, but the world’s a zoo): Dating, marriage, sex, friendship, children, finding & staying in love, and cooking (go with me, it’s late.) You may ask: Why not stick with sex and call it good?  Well, as Robert Heinlein famously wrote: A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, … Continue reading